STRESS
HOW WE RESPOND TO PRESSURE OR FEELING THREATENED
On the whole, a stress-free life simply doesn’t exist. So let’s work on accepting stress as unavoidable but, also recognise that it can be manageable. We can learn to identify where the stress is coming from and how to manage the emotional process.
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Quite often, you’ll hear people (or yourself) say, “everything!” in response to “what’s causing your stress?”. And suddenly, it feels like it really is EVERYTHING.
Like all that stuff we’ve been carrying - old, new, personal and other people’s - becomes too much and we’re overwhelmed by the enormity of it all. That’s how it feels anyway, right?
Deciphering where this stress is coming from, and why it wants your attention is a really important way to help manage stress going forward.
STRESS SIGNATURES
You have a STRESS SIGNATURE - and so does everyone else. It’s the way your body responds and informs you that you are stressed.
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Like the early symptoms of a cold (muscle ache, scratchy throat, nose starts to drip and so on), your body sends clear signals that it’s time to slow down and rest.
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We respond in the same way to too much stress. When multiple stressors stack up and you’re close to breaking point, your STRESS SIGNATURE kicks in.
HOW DO I KNOW WHAT MY STRESS SIGNATURE IS?
Mood-swings, irritability or short-temperedness might sound familiar. Perhaps reaching for alcohol, cigarettes or drugs is your go-to support system. It could be a tightness in the chest, a rising feeling like a pressure cooker. These are some examples, one or more might be your signature stress response.
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Recognising what your stress signature is will help you strengthen your awareness of where stress is coming from.
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Now let’s focus on what to do about that stress and take a look at your STRESS CONTAINER.
If you’re reading this, there’s a good chance you’re not feeling like your usual self. You might be feeling alone, lost, angry or scared. Please remember that you haven’t always felt like this. Whatever you’re feeling right now will pass. It might be in a few moments, hours or even days - but you will feel differently. This feeling will change.
YOU WILL FEEL HAPPY AGAIN.
STRESS CONTAINER
Your STRESS CONTAINER can be a useful tool to help you manage and understand your stress levels.
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1. PICTURE YOUR CONTAINER.
Try drawing it on a piece of paper or on page 9 of our FREE BOOKLET, if you like.
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2. DECIDE WHAT WILL FILL YOUR CONTAINER.
It might surprise you how many life events will affect your STRESS CONTAINER and just how much you can carry. From relationship worries, financial struggles, to career challenges and day-to-day life responsibilities.
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3. IS THIS MY STRESS TO CARRY?
Work out what belongs in YOUR container and what should remain in someone else’s container.
Q1. Do I have any evidence?
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Q2. Can I change it?
Q3. Can anyone help me with this?
Q4. Do I need to accept it?
CHECK IN WITH YOUR STRESS CONTAINER
Working through those questions will help you understand where the stress is coming from, so you can manage your stress levels in a healthy way.
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It’s useful to assess the contents of your container (this could be a bucket, a bag or a vase etc.) - should this be taking up so much space? Consider if it could be smaller or should it be removed entirely? Maybe that particular stress doesn’t belong in your container.
WITH THIS IN MIND ...
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Go back to your container, wherever you may have drawn it and take a few minutes to consider this. Hopefully, you should be able to remove some of the items and be left with a manageable amount to carry.
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Again, the goal is not an empty container, but one that is the right size for you.
